


Just You, Me, and This Trench Coat

by Averageteen



Category: Supernatural
Genre: M/M, Sam Winchester mentioned, The Impala - Freeform, and how hes handeling castiels death, but rn its all about dean, episode s07e02, episode s7e17, for like the 7 thousandth time, hes not like totally there even though sam is like everything, no sexy stuff cause im a child ofjesus, not really but i suck at writing sexy stuff, so enjoy ya bastards, still pretty gay all around, to like
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-03-13
Updated: 2018-02-18
Packaged: 2019-03-20 15:45:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 636
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13720848
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Averageteen/pseuds/Averageteen
Summary: Dean just lost his best friend, this is how he coped with it.





	Just You, Me, and This Trench Coat

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just so reading this isn't too difficult, this perspective is somewhere between third person limited and first person.  
> Deans thoughts are expressed with Italics and crossed out words. Italics are being used to express his thoughts that he allows himself to think and crossed out ones are thoughts he wouldn't let see the light of day.  
> -Ry

The roar of the Impala, shifting into a higher speed. Hitting the gas pedal harder, hoping for what he had seen would go away, all of it. Praying, ~~as if that would work anymore~~ , that sam could holdout. That the wall in his memories would stay.  _Please, Sammy, don't go digging in places that shouldn't be dug._ Hoping that focusing solely on Sam, that everything that happened would go away until later.  _Sammy is the issue, nothing else is, only sam, only sam._ Repeating the same two words over and over again. Hoping to drown out in anyway the events that happened, but he can't, it's the only thing that he sees. The only thing he cares about at the moment. 

_______________________

Bobby walks into the kitchen from the extension door to the back, wiping his hands from finishing up a project in the yard. He noticed me chugging his whiskey as if it was water. But it's not like it's the first time they were in this position, either of them. He walked upstairs as if to dismiss what I was doing.  _But what am I doing? I know Sam's back and Bobby is on his feet again._ I couldn't think, or I was thinking all too much.  _Time to drink_. Overpowering my other thoughts, reaching for the bottle once again, my hand still shaking.  _It's been weeks,_ I wouldn't even let me think I was thinking what I was thinking, ~~_He's and never coming back._ ~~ But it's not true, it can't be true.  _Oh fuck, Oh god, I need something stronger._ Getting up so quickly, hoping the faster I go the faster my feeli-, my thoughts would go away. 

______________________

"That'll be $23.79. I.D. Sir?" I stood dazed, just thinking of one thing  _Just give me that rum, oh god please, I want this week to go away, I want it all gone._ "Uh, yeah I'm sorry, lost in my thoughts for a s- you don't care, anyway, here," finally looked up at the guy and he looks like a mixture of pity and 'should I really be giving it to this guy', I am at the point where I am like  _Oh god please I need this._  "...Cash, Credit or Debit?" "C-cash."

Left the story so quickly, not even grabbing my change back and just charging ~~. As if going fast would stop this feeling in my chest.~~ So focused, now another task on my mind  _Go, go, go, go, go_ I didn't even stop until I looked over and my hand brushed over-.  _Oh fuck, oh shit_ I began crumbling, holding my tears so much that I almost fell down.  _Get your shit together Dean, everyone fucking dies._ I kept trying to tell myself that, I didn't know if I was saying out loud or not but went so fast when loading in my things. I wasn't thinking straight, I reached for that stupid trench coat. I only realized when I was inside of the Impala and it was.....  _there_ , on my lap, taunting me. 

I sat there, frozen because it hit me. So cleanly folded, so many memories flood my head.  _Lights, Fear, Obeying, Rebelling. That stupid, torn up trench coat. Flying halfway across the world and back in a breath._ I slightly chuckle because I forget  ~~all the sadness that comes with that trench coat.~~ that he's not here. But he's not really gone. Is he?  _He's not gone, it was a fucked up stress dream. He's busy. We're busy hunting Crowley._ I thought of every excuse that he was still here and it was just another dream. But then how do I have his trench coat in my hands?  ** _I am losing it, He- He can't- He-_** The dam had broken. I fell into my hands, losing myself.


End file.
